Marriage Tip Monday

Liven up a Monday evening with a special treat for dessert!  Here are a few ideas: Create an "Icecream Sundae" bar at home, surprise your sweetheart (and maybe the kids, too!) with an evening walk or drive to a local icecream shop, or pick up your spouse's favorite pint of specialty icecream at the grocery store on the way home! 


From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Laughing with your spouse is a wonderful way to relieve stress and share a fun memory.  But be sensitive.  Sometimes a moment which seems funny to you may be the "straw that breaks the camel's back" for your spouse if he or she has had a rough day.  Enjoy the times when you can share a laugh and embrace the moments when giving your spouse a hug - or just some space - is the best medicine.

From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Cultivate a spirit of generosity in your marriage.  Generosity is "Liberality in giving" or the "willingness to give."  Be willing to liberally give your love, forgiveness, affection, words of affirmation, and even your time and energy to your spouse.  Never base your giving on what you might or might not receive in return.  The beauty and power of a generous spirit is the joy that radiates from a pure motive.

From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Spring brings about change, and can inspire you to think about your dreams. Maybe there is somewhere you’ve always wanted to travel. Maybe you’ve dreamt of a career move. Maybe it’s the desire to have another child. Spend time sharing these things with your spouse and find something both of you want in life – then dream about how to make it happen. Shared dreams can help bond the two of you together.

From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Smile!  A smile is a small, self-less act of kindness and respect that can make a big impact.  A smile acknowledges another person - it lets them know you are happy to see them, that they are worth your attention, and that you are pleased by their presence.  So the next time you make eye contact with your spouse, smile!  (This even works over the phone - your spouse can detect when you're smiling, even when your face is unseen!) 

From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Husbands, a helpful invention has been the ability to record your favorite game and watch it later or find the rerun on the internet. If your wife isn't a sports fan, surprise her by recording the game and spending that time with her - she'll know you're making a sacrifice.

From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

It's been said that a married couple's bedroom should be reserved for 2 purposes only...the 2 important "S's" - Sleeping and...you know the other one!  If you watch TV, read, eat, or allow your children or pets in your bedroom, try going without these for one week and replace them with the 2 "S's."  You might find that this simple change will increase your energy, intimacy, and refreshment.

From Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part 7

(From Crosswalk.com)

Pour it On --  There's nothing like extending grace when your spouse deserved a lecture instead. I'll never forget the day I opened up another notice by mail of a red-light traffic violation. The others had just been cleared from my record. My face went white and my husband, upon realizing what it was, shook his head in resignation and handed over a rebate check he had just endorsed which would now be applied to my latest ticket!  I stood there stunned at his composure, and humbled. I knew that my reaction toward him (if he had been the one receiving the fine) wouldn't have been nearly as gracious as his toward me.  I learned that day what it really means to receive undeserved kindness.  

 
To splurge on each other is to show God's incredible love toward your spouse as He has shown it to you. You can lavish each other with love, patience, kindness, gentleness, trust, forgiveness, and understanding. To cultivate a closer connection between the two of you, splurge on each other - and love each other - as God loves you. 

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part 6

(From Crosswalk.com)

Give it Up -- How long has it been since your husband or wife had a day off to themselves? Try giving up something you need to do to offer your spouse some much needed time to relax or work on a project they've really wanted to complete. Take the kids for an evening or take back the "to do" list on a Saturday and say "this one's yours…do whatever you want to do and enjoy it as a gift from me."

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part 5

(From Crosswalk.com)

Whip it up -- It's been said that the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach. But cooking for your wife might melt her heart as well. Plan an evening to whip up your spouse's favorite dish or dessert. It's a wonderful way to say: "You were worth the time this took to prepare."

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part 4

(From Crosswalk.com)

Plan it Out -- Sometimes the best gift we can give our spouse is our time. Are you  a couple that is often over-scheduled? Take some intentional time off just to be with each other. Or better yet, plan a date and take your spouse as a surprise. It could be as simple as lunch out and a walk in the park to reconnect. If you're the busy type, taking time for the one you love is a splurge that may be much appreciated. 

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part3

(From Crosswalk.com)

3.   Write it Out --  Remember what it was like to receive a love letter? There's nothing quite like it. Yes, firing off a text from your phone is easier, but a hand-written letter is much more personal. There's something about seeing your spouse's own handwriting and being able to keep that slip of paper. Write out what is on your heart. If you haven't said it in awhile, it should be said about now, don't you think?

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part 2

(From Crosswalk.com)

Dole it Out -- Bill was a husband who loved to splurge on his wife, June. Bill and June didn't have a lot of money in their 49 years together as they raised three children in a small, rural town. But Bill knew how to spoil his wife with love, attention and praise. Today, their children will tell you "Dad spoiled mom. He'd do anything and everything for her." That is the legacy Bill left when he passed away after 49 years of marriage to his beloved, June. Are you leaving a legacy of being one who splurged on your spouse with love, attention and praise?

Marriage Tip Monday

Seven Ways to Splurge on your Spouse: Part 1

(From Crosswalk.com)


Splurging on the one you love implies going the extra mile, whether it be effort-wise, financially, sacrificially or with your time. You are giving beyond what you normally would because the one you love is priceless.


God set the splurging model for us, when He lavishly loved us by sending us His Son to be the sacrifice for our sins. In First John 3:1 we read of how God splurged on us: "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! "  He set the splurging bar rather high when He spared no expense in sending His Son to be the sacrifice for our sins. We're also told in the Bible that God is able to do "immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine." (Ephesians 3:20). That is not a God who holds out on us. That's a God who splurges to show just how "wide and long and high and deep" His love is for us (Ephesians 3:18)  If God lavishes that kind of love on us daily, can you splurge a little to show the extent of your love for each other?
To splurge on each other does not mean heaping material blessings on your spouse, although you might take that approach once in a great while. Here are seven ways you can splurge on each other when money is tight:

1.   Save it Up -- Rich and Ashley save their spare change in a jar all throughout the year. Then every Valentine's Day they take the entire contents of the jar and spend it on a special date for the two of them. This past year, they had more than $100 in the jar and Ashley thought about only spending part of it on dinner and using the rest on something the family might need. But Rich insisted that was their splurge money and so they had dinner that night at a very expensive restaurant they wouldn't ordinarily have been able to visit. So now, each year, they can truly splurge on Valentine's Day.

Marriage Tip Monday

Words hold the power of life or death - speak life!  The next time you see your spouse, tell him/her TWO THINGS - something you appreciate about WHAT THEY DO (laundry, going to work, making dinner, etc.) and something you appreciate about WHO THEY ARE (a person of integrity, an easy laugher, a quick forgiver, smart, funny, etc.)

Marriage Tip Monday

Give yourself some grace.  Did you speak harshly to your spouse, act selfishly, or pout when you didn't get your way?  We all have our moments, but it's in these moments that we can grow!  Choose to forgive yourself, apologize and ask forgiveness from your spouse, then move on.  And bonus!  It's amazing how much easier it is to extend grace and forgiveness to your spouse once you learn how to first forgive and deal with your own shortcomings.

Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

One of the best things you can do for your marriage; learn how to communicate effectively!  Say what you mean and how you're feeling, but do so in a loving, non-threatening tone.  Then listen to your spouse.  It's amazing how often we assume our spouse knows what we want, how we feel, and what we need.  No one is a mind-reader. Learning how to communicate can simplify your life and increase your intimacy! 


Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Sometimes a hug - such a simple, selfless act of love - is the best medicine.  Is your spouse feeling discouraged, overwhelmed, stressed out, unloved, or just having a bad day?  A tender, tight, unrushed hug can remind your husband or wife that you're there for them - that they aren't alone and that everything will be okay.  Sometimes actions speak louder than words.

Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

Create a Daily Point of Contact - a scheduled moment in your day where you can focus on, connect with, and affirm your spouse!   Here are some ideas:  Give your spouse an intentional kiss and "I love you" before parting ways for the day, greet your spouse with a hug each evening upon his/her arrival home, call your spouse over your lunch break, pray together after you crawl in bed each night, shower together as part of your morning or night routine, or send a daily "love-note" email.

Union 28

Marriage Tip Monday

On The Job Training


Marriage is to be held in honor among all. Hebrews 13:4

When a buffet restaurant offered a free Valentine's Day lunch to any couple who's been married for 50 years or more, over 300 people showed up. At a gathering like that, you get a lot more than a good time and good food; you also learn some good advice on what it takes to make a marriage last:

* "If I want anything fairly expensive, I'll talk it over with him, and he'll do the same with me."

* " When you go to bed, always kiss good-night. We always kiss good-bye when we leave each other."

* "I'm the boss. I make sure that everything she wants gets done."

* "Treat each other with kindness, love, and respect. Just work it out together. Don't fuss. We stay mad an hour or two, but that's it...and it's fun to make up."

* "Look at thing in different ways and concentrate on the 'good' in your relationship. I always say 'This too shall pass' and it usually does."

* "You do a lot of counting to 10.....or 20, if necessary."

* "We were always taught, 'Till death do you part.' Divorce was never discussed in our house.

*"When he was young, he was high-tempered, so I usually didn't say much. But when you don't say anything, you don't have to take anything back."

* "When we said 'I do', we didn't say it was just for tomorrow. You've got to tie the knot where it can't be untied."

Spoken like real pros.

DISCUSS
Regardless of how long you've been married, what would you say are the secrets of your commitment to each other?

PRAY
Ask God for many years together....and for all the daily requirements of life-long love.


Taken from Moments with You by Dennis & Barbara Rainey